Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Some Musings on some Shoulds

It's a New Year. A New Year brings new enthusiam for things in our lives. These can be old things (like losing weight/getting in shape) or new things (This year I am going to try/do [fill in the blank]). But it's the enthusiasm that's important!

I've been reading and hearing a lot of talk on different boards and groups and within my circle of friends about the things we SHOULD be doing as women. Working out, caring for our homes, caring for our children, volunteering at school, sewing, home decorating, cleaning, yard work, taking pictures, laundry, shining our sinks, scrapbooking, and maybe, just maybe, caring for ourselves somewhere near the bottom of the list if and when all the other things are finished. Some of my women friends, both in person and online, even feel guilty that the things they should do are undone, or feel guilty if they take a little time for themselves--because that time SHOULD be spent doing the rest of the things on the list--especially the undone things. How enthusiastic can you be about laundry? The boxes of pictures that are tugging at the edges of your mind? Yet another pile of toys to conquer? The guilt and "shoulds" just keep piling up.

I think that's rubbish. I really do. The guilt and "shoulds" will only pile up IF WE LET IT. Who decides what we SHOULD do anyway? Who has the right to suck our enthusiasm for our life right out the window? Who decided this set of "rules" that we have to live our lives by? That is one of the things I like about the FlyLady philosophy: You decide your OWN shoulds, and release yourself from someone else's.

My Grandfather Price felt that all women in the world should be revered and honored JUST BECAUSE they were women. I LOVE that idea. We women keep the world in order. Some of us bear children; ALL of us love and nuture the next generation. We keep our homes in order--some days more than others--and we love our friends, our families, our hobbies. We can take a break if we need one. We can keep working if we feel like it. We make the world a prettier place just with our presence. We sing peace. We make differences around us every day.

So today, I want to leave you with some enthusiasm. Love your life--wherever it is! My best friend and I are supporting each other through a weight loss/exercise regime this year. We've been talking for years about how unhappy we've been with our weight gain and change in size, and this year, we are doing more than talking about it. Our motto is "Face It and Fix It." We've weighed ourselves and taken measurements with the mantra of "No Judgements, No Guilt--Just Face It and Fix It." This has been marvelous for me at least. I enjoy making the changes I need to make to "Fix" what I am working on this year. I want you to have the same enthusiasm in your life. Find something YOU'VE been feeling bad about and tell yourself that IT'S OKAY! And either let it go, or figure out what you need to do to fix it. No Judgements, No Guilt. Just love and support. And it's okay.

And that's the other side


Anonymous said...

I LOVE this idea!! You've put into words what I've been feeling for the longest time. Thank you for all of your encouragement and enthusiasm!

your litte sister,

Cami said...

Amen Sista! You Rock!!!
I agree with Kimberly...exactly what I've been thinking. I live my life for me. Granted my daughter is a huge part of who I am but still have me. Self loving is waaaaay better than self loathing.

Michelle said...

I love this post! you're inspiring without a doubt.

Stout Family said...

I don't know you very well but think your blog looks great. I'm on the TSC board. What you said is really amazing. I think it is so true. Women are special just because they are. Some days it is hard to appreciate that when others around you don't. But that is an amazing reminder. Thank you.